Next steps

I have gotten over my initial grief/shame/anguish/indignation at my diagnosis. I have begun to embrace it. After all, it has been part of me from at least my teens and more than likely my early childhood. I have lived with it and struggled to be as high functioning as I am.

On Monday, my psychologist released me from her care. I have her card and I am welcome to call but we are done. She feels I have made significant progress(Look Ma, no depression!) I am also two weeks into my intensive work with my old/new therapist. Next week, I will join a group at the hospital. It is actually similar to my depression group in that it will combine group support and skills-based instruction in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy.(DBT) DBT was created specifically to help people with borderline personality symptoms manage their emotions. I also have the option of staying with my Women’s Support Group(which I plan to continue). Both my doctor and I were excited about the next phase of my journey.

For me, it is reassuring to know there are others. I know there are approximately two million of us but meeting them and working with them will be important. My doctor has forewarned me that I may be the highest functioning and that I will meet those who are low functioning. I am intrigued. I know it will change my thinking about my condition but more importantly, about myself.

In the meantime, I’m continuing my Hermione Granger(Harry Potter’s brainy best friend who is always hitting the books) approach to mental illness. I’m now reading a third book and plan to continue to explore other material. I’m sure I’ll be raising my hand to share in group and volunteering to take part in exercises. It’s time to learn as much as I can about me.

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