It has been months since I put poems on paper. This morning was an exorcism long overdue.
I never said experiences with demons couldn’t end happily.

The Sounds of Heartache

Sister Stevie sings
and I weep, clench my fists.
So many sounds speak
for my heart,
that duct-taped mess:
mariachi wedding marches,
church choirs,
a dog’s whimper,
old school rap songs the old gang shouts in unison,
the clink of beer glasses,
girlish laughter,
mousetrap snap,
keyboard clicks,
the step-step-step-exhale
of those jogs I call running,
running away from the years of
silence
and denial
and truth.
I held a funeral for the poet I was
but like the phoenix tattooed on my back,
I live.
Underneath the silver stickiness,
I wait
for the future I pretend
I don’t want or need.
Inside my heart, that tough little survivor,
I
scream.

JAC-U. 9/30/06